The Idea of Genuine Gratitude
We’ve all heard of gratitude and how we need more of it. While this is true, how are we supposed to know what it really means and looks like? Where was our lesson on gratitude?
Gratitude changes who you are.
It brings a laundry-list of benefits including: confidence, self-love, improved mental health, enhanced relationships, happiness, fulfillment, a greater sense of calm and much more.
The coolest part of gratitude? When engaged often and *correctly,* it rewires your brain. You reprogram your brain that brings more gratitude and joy + less stress.
What if I told you that gratitude is more than and wildly different compared to just listing things that make you happy or feel good. Dive into genuine gratitude, how to experience more of it and other cool lessons within this post. Let’s get into it.
Genuine Gratitude
Mel Robbins, one of the world’s most followed podcast hosts and author, talks about the idea of genuine gratitude.
This can be defined as noticing and appreciating what’s around you. You experience this type of gratitude when something causes a profound reaction in your brain. Your body notices too.
You feel calmer, happier and more focused. A wave comes over you and there’s a shift in how you feel. It’s a deep, powerful experience.
There’s a difference between this and how we normally think of gratitude. When completing a gratitude practice, it’s common to list things that you’re thankful for. Think surface level.
We say things like “I’m grateful for my health,” “I’m grateful for another day” and “I’m grateful for a roof over my head.”
While these are all things we are and should be thankful for, genuine gratitude is more transformative.
Being thankful is transactional, automatic, in the moment and a part of good manners (someone holding a door open for you). Genuine gratitude occurs when you’re deeply moved and you’re filled with appreciation. These moments take you by surprise and the related emotions linger.
There are four “requirements” for a moment to be impactful and have the desired chemical reaction. Having these stimulates our feel-good hormones such as dopamine, oxytocin and norepinephrine (think energy). We want these so that we're getting the full effects of its power.
The four requirements for genuine gratitude:
The moment has to be specific and detailed
The moment needs to be deeply personal
Answer: Why is it moving you? What about it moves you?
The feeling from the moment sticks with you. It doesn’t just pass.
Mel also talks about toxic gratitude. This is when gratitude is used negatively and you’re only looking at one side of a situation. Keep an eye out for a separate blog post covering this topic.
Listen to Mel’s podcast episode all about genuine gratitude here.
How to Have More Genuine Gratitude
Be present. You MUST be present to fully witness these moments. Be awake, aware and willing to notice them.
The funny thing about gratitude? It helps you be the things above too. Once you start the cycle, it’ll keep going – it becomes a system of gratitude.
What you focus on expands and you can choose what you decide to focus on. There’s always going to be negativity, issues and problems but that doesn’t mean you ignore the good. You can always find gratitude.
We always want more, but we tend to forget how amazing what we already have is. The focus becomes what we don’t have, what’s lacking and the negatives. Choose to live in an environment of gratitude rather than problems.
Takeaways
It might take some practice to pinpoint moments of genuine gratitude. Search and look for times you’re in awe. Something leaves you feeling absolutely amazing, buzzing, happy, excited.
That’s genuine and it’s a time to be grateful.
Becoming aware of these instances is easier when you choose to be mindful and present. You’ll never be given more without appreciating what you currently have. Make the changes you need to open yourself to more genuine moments.